10% battery left on my computer. Gulp. 0 words down, 2000 to go. Gulp. It is gone 12am (well, 12.32 to be precise) and I am in the library trying to write an essay for tomorrow morning on a topic I don’t particularly like without a power cord. Everyone has gone to Camera Tuesdays (when did people start going out on Tuesdays?) and I am all-alone. Life’s a bummer. Oh, and f***, I have a blog to write.

　　电脑电量仅剩百分之十。有点憋屈得慌。我一个字儿也没写，还剩2000字。更加憋屈。已经过了12点（呵呵，准确地说已经12点32分），然而我却仍在图书馆，试图在黎明到来之前，为一个没有什么感觉的话题扯一篇论文，还没带电源线。所有人都去参加Camera Tuesdays的活动了（大家什么时候星期二就开始夜生活了？），然而我却孑然一身注孤生。生活就是一个巨大的坑。矮油我**（此处消音），还要写这篇专栏。

　　Perhaps the most depressing thing about the above is the fact that most students reading it would have little sympathy. They, after all, have been in far worse predicaments. They have worked until 3am before or have pulled an all-nighter. Working through the night is a commonly accepted fact for the sleep-deprived student who views them like a badge of honour, going around college boasting of how he pulled two all-nighters in a row. Oxonians, it seems, are night animals. This image fits into the whole work-hard, play-hard ethos Oxford seems to have going.

　　不过最让人郁闷的还是，读到这里时大多数学生对我的处境也许毫无怜悯之心。毕竟，大家都是一路被坑过来的。刷夜到3点，或者干脆通宵。身为缺觉的“学僧”，熬夜学习已经是不争的事实，广为接受，甚至引以为豪，在校园里到处显摆自己连续两天通宵如何如何。看来牛津大学学生都是“熬夜大牛”，搭配牛津苦学疯玩的校风也是醉了。

　　Yet, there is a reason why so many students at Oxford feel burnt out after only 8 weeks of work: such a lifestyle is unhealthy. It fails on all three fronts – social, academic and sleep (obviously). Let us first tackle the social aspect. For most young people, night time forms the culmination of their daily social experience. (Unless you are a rower who has to get up at 5.30 in the morning in which case a) this article doesn’t apply to you as you manage your time far too well already and b) give up – there is more to life).  Why, therefore, would you want to eat into it by doing work, which you could have done in the daytime instead of Internet shopping? From my present personal experience, there is nothing more depressing than seeing all your friends have a good time whilst you needlessly slog away in the library.

　　然而，大多牛津学生撑了8周之后就如炙烤难耐，也就情有可原了：这样的“夜生活”方式实在无益“绳命健康”。不仅在睡眠上（这个太明显了），在社交和学习上都行不通。就让我们先看看社交方面吧。对大多数年轻人来说，夜晚可是平日社交生活的巅峰时刻（除非你是个桨手，必须早上5点半起床【译者注：英语文化认为划艇运动员早上5点半起床开始训练，平常基本没有什么社交生活】，那么第一，这篇文章对你来说没什么意义，因为你已经把时间利用的很好了，肯定不至于刷夜；第二，算了吧，何苦如此呢，生活还有更多精彩等着你）。既然如此，为什么你还要侵蚀自己大好的社交时光来刷夜学习呢，大白天的本来可以好好学习，你为什么要在淘宝上逛来逛去呢？就拿我此刻的切身感受来说，眼睁睁看着朋友尽情地high，而自己在图书馆步履维艰地赶死线，最悲惨不过了。

　　In the academic world, such a lifestyle screws you over even more. After the bewitching hour, people stop to concentrate properly and what might have taken 20 minutes in a post-noon high now takes 2 hours in a post-midnight low. What is more, the bullshit you produce burning the midnight oil is not even good bullshit – it rarely makes sense, often lacks coherence and is littered with spelling errors. That lie you tell your bleary eyed self when you finally go to bed – you know the one where you kid yourself into thinking that you will carry out a meaningful edit of your masterpiece in the morning – is just that, a lie, and it requires a rare character to do anything more than correcting the odd misuse of the colon before sending it off in the morning.

　　再说说学习方面，刷夜更是百害而无一利。过了凌晨，大家就已经不能够正常集中精神了，也许正午过后能量满格时20分钟能够解决的任务，到了午夜之后需要2小时才能搞定。而且，午夜时分拼了老命扯出来的玩意儿，在废话里都算不上一等——文章里很少有在理的言论，经常逻辑不通，拼写错误还这一个那一个随地都是。你对着那个睡眼朦胧最终爬向床铺的自己许下的“诺言”——这个你应该清楚，就是你骗自己说早上醒来后还可以认认真真地把大作修改一番的那个——纯属扯淡，早上交作业前，除了改改几个冒号，得是多奇葩的人类才能做出更大改动呢。

　　In some senses, this is a pointless blog post to write. Very few people mean to stay up all night, they just are forced into that situation through sheer laziness. I am not going to kid myself into thinking that what I have written will change anybody’s working patterns. Anyway, people who do manage to do all their work ridiculously early exist only to be antagonized as people we love to hate. I probably would not even take my own advice. However, if you take away one thing, take away this: much like getting hammered, essay crises are not things to be proud of.

　　说来这篇博文没有什么意义。很少很少的人是有意要熬夜通宵的，只是因为白天太懒才被逼无奈到此田地。我也不会骗自己说看了这篇文章的人都会痛改前非规律作息。但是无论如何，还是有那群什么工作都完成得巨尼玛早的人类，存在的唯一目的就是拉仇恨。我可能自己甚至都不会接受自己建议的规范作息。但是，如果你真要什么建议的话，听哥一句：就像喝得烂醉如泥不值得自喜，论文死线危机也不是什么引以为豪的事。

    》》更多精彩冲分课程：
    四级冲刺班（必胜课教师团）  四级冲刺班（高分战队）
    四级冲刺班（优质四级）     六级冲刺班（东方六必治）
    六级冲刺班（笑傲六级）      六级冲刺班（六神战队)

(责任编辑：田学江)